Ok so our 3rd IVF/ICSI is well on its way, and I am feeling really positive. I decided that I can only do what I can do and the rest is up to God. I am really trusting and praying that God will just heal my body and restore all my quality of my eggs and that those embbies will grow into our babies. You see it is God's will for us to have the blessing of children and I am not going to let anything rob us of this blessing so I am standing firm on God's word and His promises to us and I will not waiver. God is a God of His word and He wants us to have that unconditional faith that when we do only have 4 eggs, and a low AMH level and a high FSH that He is the God that gives and restores - and He is in control of my life - and our future babies - and I am humbled by the thought that He would entrust that blessing to me and my wonderful, loving, caring husband :)
God really knew what He was doing when He gave me my husband - I could not have asked or even imagined to pray for someone who loves me as much as he does - his love for me is truly unconditional. He said to me the other day babe can you imagine how boring our lives would be if we never had challenges in life - and that everything we have been through has made us stronger, brought us closer - made us appreciate the gift of life so much more!
So we set off for our second honeymoon to Cape Town tomorrow - with 4 embbies waiting for what the future holds. And I'm believing the future has me holding them. I am on Day 10 of my cycle which makes it Day7 of injections (Gonal F and Menopur and Femara tabs - now on the progynova) had my cetrotide injection on Day8 to prevent our eggies from releasing. So scan on Friday morning early and the POA.
We are staying in Fish Hoek with my Uncle and Aunt in their beautiful beach home overlooking the amazing ocean and bay of Fish Hoek. I will post pix. Can't wait for Cape Town and what it holds for us. (nothing more beautiful then an expectant heart) I am expecting God to pour His favour over our lives.
Today I have learnt to not just stand in faith but to walk in it as well - in everything we do. Its not something that once you have it you have it - it is a constant battle with my mind, the enemy, people who try and rob me of my happy place, but as long as I keep my eyes on Jesus and make Him my centre - I have nothing to fear - NOTHING TO FEAR! Everywhere YOU go I go.....
I am constantly reminded of the story of Hannah in 1 Samuel 1 - Hannah the women of FAITH....as she was so desperate for a baby and cried out to God and after many years of barreness God answered her prayers and blessed her with her son Samuel who went on to being God's servant.
All of the Patriarch's wives were barren, Sarah wife of Abraham... Rebekah wife of Isaac and Rachel wife of Jacob. God had promised all three that they would be fathers of many nations and carry the lineage that was to be blessed and the lineage that would be a blessing to ALL nations. It was a test of faith that these three men would believe and trust God when they saw that they could do nothing for their circumstances. And then there is Hannah mother of Samuel who went on to be Gods servant who anointed Saul and David King of Israel. God had such an amazing plan for all these women - so friends don't be discouraged as God has not forgotten about you. He wants us to come to Him and trust Him - He WILL answer our prayers!
Lord I pray for each and every women out there that is struggling to conceive and experienced such great loss in their journey to have the blessing of a baby. I pray Lord that you hear our cries and hearts desire and bless us all with babies. Heal our broken bodies, our damaged cells, our unbalanced hormone levels, our husbands sperm, guide the doctors hands and bless us all with our hearts desire - as I do what I can - Lord will you do the rest - I surrender to You and ask that Your will be done and completed in us. I promise to bring up my children to know You and make You their centre. Thank you for all the blessings you have blessed us with along this journey, and thank you for my wonderful husband that I will love and treasure all the days of my life.
Lord you give my life Purpose - I could not do this without you!
xxxx
